..I am now feeling a lot more sad about my life.
Remember in my last post I talked about my situation and how it was a good thing I was dating someone? Well, we broke up the day after I posted that. So looks like those juicy details I promised for a later post will never get published. It will stay in draft form.
Break ups are never easy. I might say this has been the worst so far. My past break ups have been ones I've seen coming, or at least I realized afterward there were signs of something wrong. This one took me completely by surprise. Other break ups, I've gotten the feeling it was the right thing to do and was able to rely on that peaceful feeling to keep me strong through it all. For this one, I'm still searching for that feeling.
So, my heart is broken. It is starting to heal, but very slowly. I think I have mastered the motto "fake it till you make it." I have learned to hide my true feelings and people think I'm completely fine. But I'm not. I know I will be. I know that everything happens for a reason. I know that my Heavenly Father knows what is best for me. I have faith that he knows what he is doing. I know in my past I have wanted many things that haven't happened. I was devastated at first, but looking back I realize how much better my life is now not having gone the way I planned. So I trust that everything will work out.
One thing that has always been a blessing after a crappy breakup, is realizing how many people I have in my life that I can count on. I have people that will sit with me while I cry, talk to me on the phone for forty minutes just to distract me, make me get out of bed and leave my room to go do something, will drive an hour and a half just to be with me, buy me food and force me to eat it. Seriously, the list goes on and on. So thank you. Thanks to all of you out there who love me enough to stay by my side during the hard times.
:)
